Hypnosis: Establishing Rapport with Pacing
is all about getting your way. Who does not want to get
their way and be in control of situations? Being in control
gives you power and that leads to getting what you want.
The most important aspect of conversational hypnosis is
learning the art of developing rapport with another person.
Rapport is the ability to be “in tune” with someone
subconsciously. It is important to establish rapport because
rapport will help you gain a sense of trust with the other
person. Rapport will allow you to persuade and control to
ultimately get your way.
Seventy percent of a “conversation” occurs without words.
You can convey a lot with body language, facial expression,
and hand gestures. There are different techniques to use
while interacting with someone. Both verbal and non-verbal
cues are used to establish rapport.
Rapport can be established verbally and non-verbally through
pacing and mirroring. Pacing is doing what someone else does
in the same way that they do it. Pacing can be verbal or
non-verbal, involving conversation, body language, and
rhythm to name a few. Mirroring is non-verbal and involves
body language, hand gestures, and anything not involving
conversation. In this article I will just talk about pacing.
Establishing rapport using pacing can involve figuring out a
persons representational system (ie: visual, auditory,
kinesthetic) and using this to your advantage. Matching
someone’s representational system makes the other person
feel as though you are able to easily relate to them.
Another pacing technique involves listening to the other
person’s rhythm as they speak. Most people have a natural
cadence to their speech. Pay attention to their tempo and
see if you can match it. This creates rapport with a natural
cadence and flow to the conversation.
Another cue to pay attention to is their tone of voice. Is
it high pitched or low pitched? If it is a very distinct
pitch, then it is probably not a good idea to match because
it could cause the opposite of rapport! If matching their
voice tone involves just a slight change in your tone, then
try it out. You will be surprised at how easy this technique
In order to establish rapport through pacing, you must
practice! Give yourself around one week to try these
techniques out on friends or strangers. It is a lot of fun
to practice at a party. Be patient and practice and you too
can master these skills to develop rapport.
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